Research For 'Rents

Your kid talks funny, but not for long

In our last post, “Why mispronouncing words is good for your kid,” we talked about how flubbing up all sorts of speech sounds is a totally normal part of your child’s language development.

We even showed you this pretty cool chart that lets you know at which ages many common mispronunciations tend to disappear:


What did we tell you? Pretty cool, right?

Then we discovered a couple of really funny posts over on the Mommy Shorts blog featuring a whole bunch of words that have been “totally butchered by toddlers.” And that made us think that our handy-dandy chart would be the ideal tool for figuring out exactly when each of those adorably erroneous kid-ism would sadly be lost, forever replaced by the boring old correct pronunciations we adults have all mastered.

(Or at least most of us have.)

Here’s what we found:

Baboons should become Balloons when your kid gets the hang of “L”s – somewhere around age 3 to 6.

Your Borehead will once again become a Forehead after your little one masters the “F” – around age  2 ½ to 4.

Juice will unfortunately remain Douche until age 4 to 8, when your child figures out those tricky “J” sounds.

Your kids won’t trade their Baby Soup for Bathing Suits until they can say “TH,” which happens between 4 ½ and 8.

Penis will turn into Peanuts once your child cracks the “T” between ages 2 and 6.

Your toddler’s feet will be covered in Socks, not Cocks, only after the “S”s come between ages 3 and 8.

And you should finally be able to stop apologizing to waiters because your kid asked them for a Fuck instead of a Fork by age 3 to 6, when “R”s become easy.

So if your kid is currently making any fabulously funny faux pas like these, be sure to check the chart above for their expiration dates – and then get some video evidence of the cuteness while you still can!


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